Wow! What a lame week for me to be so busy I can barely see straight! I have been so preoccupied with getting on this here little blog to shout out a super quick update and OF COURSE it's like chaos and pandemonium in my life and I haven't had a second to even breathe.
enter: psychiatrist appointment yesterday + med adjustment. Not a moment too soon...
Hey! Did you guys notice that things are looking much prettier around here lately? I done spiffed up the place! Well, I didn't do it, personally. I would give just about anything for the talent and super creative eye that my sweet girl, Tiffany at Tiffany Kuehl Designs has....We have been working together for a couple of weeks on my new design and let me tell you guys something about this girl...she is a ROCK STAR. She nailed it. I'm not gonna lie, I was worried....not cuz I didn't have faith in her, I mean, I've seen her portfolio and that's why I chose her...her style is just the bee's knees to me (Do people still say that? The bee's knees? It's so silly. Bees don't have knees....do they? Anyway...), but I was worried because....well....people? I'm a control freak.
Would you please look at what an amazing job she did? I am seriously blown away. I love absolutely every single thing about it and she was such a pleasure to work with. If you are in the market for a new blog design, she is your girl....you will thank me.
Speaking of thank yous....I think I owe a few!!!! I never expected my little birthday giveaway to get so much attention! I am so flattered by all of my new follower (hi you guys!!!!!) and so thankful for all the sweet birthday love you sent my way!! I can't wait to find out who the winner of all the goodies is going to be! And if you haven't entered yet, what are you waiting for????? go here and get on it!
I'm taking the week off next week. Not from blogging, hopefully, but from work. Not a moment too soon cuz folks, I was about thisclose to going postal all up in here....I tend to "hoard" in small amounts, and vacation days are not exempt from this tendency....in other words, I was "saving" them for something important and all that means is that it's the end of August, I've only used one day so far this year and I'm about ready to light the entire staff on fire and run screaming into the hills like a hyena. Thank the baby Jesus for vacation days. Plans? You'll have to stay tuned...
Ladieeeeees!!!!! (and gents...hey...we take all kinds here!) today is the day!
Birthday doom. I'm fighting it. I'm fighting it hard. This is easy for me to say because it's sunday night as I write this and the "celebration" is over. Let's call it like it is, birthdays that fall on mondays are crap, so for the sake of argument, I "celebrated" today, Sunday.....and how did I celebrate? I went to my Weight Watchers meeting to find out I hadn't lost an ounce in 2 weeks. then, I drove past the gym I was planning to join and I stuck my tongue out and kept driving. then I came home and moped, went to the splash park with Ben (highlight of the day. I wish I brought my camera...it was awesome!), came home, moped some more and went to dinner...
But nevermind about all that because I am a big moper and I will forever be pissy about my birfday. love me for me.....
Let's talk about YOU! Let's talk about how it's your lucky day! I have some goodies for you guys! I have been wanting to do a giveaway for a long time now, but I wanted it to be something that I really loved and believed in....
Stuff that was my favorite.....
So twist muh arm, I went to the mall......
and I got sommmmmmmmme-lucky-follwer a prezzie!!!!
Here's what's up for grabs, gals...
I love lipsgloss. did you know? I'm obsessed. and one of the BEST ones I have found is a semi-cheapie by NYX in "natural". It goes on looking almost translucent with a little sparkle, but it complements your natural color perfectly. It would be a great color on anyone....it's slick and not sticky, it smells yummy, and I'm giving one to you! Along with a gorgeous MAC dazzleglass in "rags to riches" which is beautiful, flattering, sparkly gold. so pretty for fall....PLUS, a cutie little bag for 'em to ride in....
But wait! there's more!!!
Who likes to munch?
Have you had the Trader Joe's dark chocolate caramel bar with black sea salt? You haven't? Let me help you. Let me also send you a box of fluer de sel caramels......thank me later.....
Do you want a new bronzer brush? How about a new BOBBI BROWN brozer brush? I love this brush. I have one.Iit's the bomb. And let's just face it. fall is coming and our tans are gonna fade. You need a bronzer brush....
Last, but not least, I also want you to have these earrings I picked out just for you Friday night at Francesca's when I went birthday shopping with my biify, Mich. Then we went to Cheesecake Factory. I wish you were there!!!! But since you weren't, I got you earrings. Do you love them? Cuz I do. i love them like WHOA. and I'm giving them to you! LUCKY!
The bottom line is, guys, you make me happy. It makes me happy to know somebody reads this nonsence, that maybe it makes you smile, or laugh, or relate. It's a human thing. It's awesome. and, I can think of no time better than my birthday to tell you thank you for sharing this journey with me. And I think I got you some pretty fun stuff...
Nnow who wants it?
The giveaway starts at midnight tonight (8/20) and will run through Friday (8/24) , when rafflecoptor will pick a winner....I think...I have never used rafflecoptor before. *fingers crossed*
The middle of August is so bittersweet. It’s still summer, but the end is so near, and while I love fall, and sweaters and pumpkin spice lattes and Halloween and homemade soup and crisp air, I can’t help but stand around with my half empty glass thinking about the dirty piles of grey snow, grey skies, grey skin that belong to January, February and March. . I feel like summer got jipped this year too, because in June I got my tickets to this, and I have basically been able to think of nothing else for the last 3 months…..I feel resentful about that. I want my summer back….
But when, inevitably, those grey skies come around and I can see every breath that comes out of my mouth, when there’s not a decent vegetable to be found and my Seasonal Affective Disorder is about to eat me alive, I will look back on this summer and remember this face, full of glee and happy chaos, running through the sprinklers, squealing in delight.
I love this boy….every happiness I am blessed enough to share with him fills the gas tank of my soul and gives me a reason to keep on keeping on….without him, it just wouldn’t be worth it.
And he loves summer. Just like his mama….
Another reason that summer is the shizz is that it’s my birthday on Monday and guess who is getting the present??? You are!!! Make sure you come back and see what girly goodies I have in store for you! I, for one, am super excited about it!
she had this great idea for a list…which, as you well know is one of my favorite things…ahhhh for the love of lists…anyway, a list of things that the word would be if she were in charge. Brilliant. Here are mine…
If I ran the world…
First of all, the only foods that would have calories would be the ones that are truly, truly terrible for you….like County Fair Food. you know, deep fried twinkies, etc. now, this might sound counter-intuitive, but hear me out…we have to eat to fuel our bodies, and honestly, I am all for eating as many healthy foods as we can because, for me at least, I feel good when I eat things that are good for me. unfortch, foods that are bad for me are sooooooooooo delicious….I’m talking to you, In n’ Out Double Double Animal Style. So I think that paying the price for “bad” foods is reasonable, and I am all about reason, but when you’re starving and sit down to a huge turkey sandwich with avocado, mayo and cheddar, tomato, sprouts and bacon with a side of fruit salad and some curly fries (for balance, obviously) I don’t think you should have to cash in 1200 calories for that, cuz there are tons of nutrients there. It’s just how I feel.
bastards. get in my mouth.
Still with me?
Moving on….if I ran the world…
Just by pinning a recipe, you’d automatically have all the ingredients in your kitchen and the expertise to whip it up!
And while we’re at it, just by pinning an outfit, it would automatically be in your closet, and just by pinning a picture of some skinny, sweaty chick in tiny spandex shorts in a sports bra doing a squat, you’d automatically have her body. I mean, why not?
People would always hold doors for other people, say please and thank you and wave when you let them in your lane.
Mental illness wouldn’t exist. Neither would judging. Except for fun…judging for fun is ok, but judging to be nasty is not. This is not Mean Girls.
When you give birth, or adopt, or otherwise come to be the parent of a tiny being, you would be given a handbook with instructions that were perfectly tailored for YOUR individual baby. None of this “happiest baby on the block” crap.
There would be no cancer.
Pijamas would be considered professional attire so we could all come to work in our flannels and bunny slippers if we wanted, but if we wanted to dress up, that would be ok too. See above: no judging.
There’d be no such thing as blogger’s block.
I’d never have to hear another child with otherwise good parents call another child by a nasty name or something derogatory or racist. I’ve heard way too many children refer to their friends as “fags” or ”idiots” or even worse, racist names I won’t even type….really? Where are they learning this hate so young? It is sad. So in my world, it ends. Kids are respectful of adults and of each other.
The second a person even thinks of abusing a child, their genitals shrivel up and fall off forever.
There is a Cute Boy Channel that plays nothing but reruns of Man vs. Food, Americas Best Sandwich and David Cook concert footage 24/7….what? I’d watch it.
I'm the world's worst blogger. I know this. Don't think it has gone unnoticed by me that I am blogging once a week max these days. I can't get my act together. I am uninspired....I definitely have things to blog about, like, I went into NYC Saturday to meet up with my girlfriends for the first time in seriously forever and we had a ball...there was brunching with fabulous gay boys at a restaurant that should have been a spa, there were bloody marys and fancy cocktails and the requisite zip through times square....then there may or may not have been a small amount of buzzed tweeting to boys whom we sometimes really believe are our actual celebrity-ish boyfriends, there was much shopping at Lush (oops.) because I feel entitled in August since it is my birfday...
Then, I came home Saturday to a package from the mailman stuffed with the hair extensions I ordered (see above paragraph re: birthday entitlement) that I am SO stoked about even though they weigh as much as a small car and are hotter than mother effing hell.
Please pay no attention to the fact that I clipped them into my affro after spending the whole day traipsing through midtown in 90% humidity...if I ever bother to actually put them in to go out somewhere as opposed to just playing dress-up in my house, I'll curl them right and make them look presentable, take some pics and blog it out, but don't hold your breath on that cuz I am about the laziest person I ever met. So, they're from Locks & Bonds and the color is absolutely scrumptious and they feel like silk and their shipping was lightening fast. Like I said, I haven't styled them yet, not that I'm some expert, but so far so good and I totally recommend buying your hairz from them, if you're in the market for hairz.
See? I told you I was tapped out. It's my birthday week, I've got zilch for plans besides hosting a fun giveaway for all of you, so make sure you come back next Monday for that aaaaand that's all she wrote.
Let’s talk for a minute about my weekend, although it really could have been any of the weekends of my life. I keep things pretty consistent for the most part….I’ll sum it up short and sweet….there was wine and now? There are injuries. Let’s be honest, even in the absence of wine, with me, you can usually count on at least an injury a week. as Scott likes to say, “I’m not so fleet of foot…”.
Noreen and I went on a trolley tour of the North Fork Wineries…it was a blast. The wine was delish and plentiful, the company was fantastic…but both of us were most excited for the post-winery stop at Tattoo Lou’s…
Want to feel better about yourself? I’m about to make that happen….think of a place where you really, really hope to come off at least a little bit more fancy funky fresh than you really are….where you just desperately need whatever bits of "hip" your soul might possess to shine center stage and not embarrass the f*ck out of you, just this once. Tattoo Lou’s seems like a good place for that, right? I mean, cuz only bad asses have tattoos (?), and so there you are, walking into….scratch that, sauntering into Tattoo Lou’s, channeling your inner Angelina Jolie, ready to get inked….but instead of gracefully sauntering in, if you’re ME, instead, you get the toe of your FLAT sandal stuck under the door jamb and you trip, landing splayed out across the floor of the grody tattoo parlor, the bell tied to the door all jingling, everyone turning to stare….
I like to make an enterance.
Psh……what? That's how I roll folks.
last pic ever of the tat free right wrist....a work in progress & the finished product. i love.
So, yea, that happened. You really cannot take me anywhere. I stood up. I dusted myself off (because lord only knows what cooties reside on that floor), I made the announcement to my adoring public “I’m ok! I’m ok…I’m just THAT girl…”and everyone had a chuckle while I skulked over to the wall and comforted my bruised ego…and my bruised arm…and my bruised knees…..
this is the bruise today. yummy, huh?
Then, we had some unbelievably incredible Mexican food and margaritas which I unapologetically scarfed down with reckless abandon. Oops.Because nothing soothes a bruised ego like tequila, baby….
Today is a very special day……it is the BIRTHDAY of one of my Bloggie Besties, Amber…this girl…she is the whole package. She cracks me up on the daily…she is gorgeous, and funny and smart as a whip. Go show her some birthday love today!!!! And enter her giveaway too, while you’re at it!!! Ambizzle, I hope you can feel all the love and kisses I’m sending your way gurl…I am so happy we found each other…LOVE YOU, BISH!!
p.s. Amber would NEVER fall flat on her face walking into a tattoo parlor. See? that’s what I mean. She’s the bomb.
If you are, maybe you haven’t noticed that my lazy busy ass has not blogged in a week. A week. That is an eternity in blog world, I know it to be true. The dumbest part about that is that in lieu of actually blogging, I made a list (in my new Erin Condren Planner, thank you very much) of great things I want to blog about and am about to start a list of things I am going to put in my “It’s My Birfday, Bish!” giveaway later this month. I know I said I was waiting on the giveaway until I got to 100 followers, but I lied.
Lists. It’s what I do best.
So anyway, how lame is that? Blogging about making a list of things I want to blog about, which is sort of similar to one of the topics on that actual list, which is “blogging about blogging”….????????? Huh?
I need a drink.
A big one. That size Right Thur.....
It’s Friday. Thank the baby Jesus and all the lambs.
Do you want to hear the saddest thing? We never got those lobsters I was ranting and raving about last weekend. I don’t know what happened. Maybe it was my responsibility to call and order them, I do not know, but somebody dropped the ball and I spent the weekend eating cold, leftover dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets and drinking that bottle of Booker’s Bourbon I promised to buy myself….which I did…so that's a great accomplishment...and guess what I decided? Even if a bourbon costs $65 a bottle, I still would rather drink wine. I wish I was a bourbon girl. Bourbon girls are so bad ass. I want to be bad ass. I’m not. It’s a damn shame.
What the heck is going on here??
Oh right. lobsters. So now the lobster TAILS are on sale for $2.99 each. Maybe they had extra tails to get rid of after lobster fest last weekend or….what? I’m not going to think about it. I am just going to eat them. Tonight. For real. I know you don’t believe me anymore, but I am going to prove you wrong. But before I eat those little cockroaches of the sea, I am going to get muh hairz did with my homegirl, Ambizzy fo Shizzy….
It’s all just so exciting!
So I just swung by my corner of the interwebz here for a sec to let you all know I am still alive and tell you that I love you. I love each and every one of you. With my heart.