happy.

You can go ahead and let out that deep breath you’ve been holding, stop chewing your pretty nails and pacing in a panic…I’m alive. I’m here. It’s just been one HECK of a shopping/working/planning extravaganza this week! Whew!! And I mean WHEW did I get some good bargains…he hee heeeee...

(p.s. I love Kohl’s. like, true love, for real, ok? And during the regular year, I totally forget how much I love them and then Christmas comes around and they are all “EARLY BIRD! NIGHT OWL!” and I’m all “oh hell YES I sure did just save $219.71 thank you very much!” how do they do it? I don’t know or care, but what I do know is that my new gallery wall is going to look so amazing in my living room, I got 2 of the cutest shirts ever for the monkey - plaid flannel Osh Kosh say what? - I really think the husband is going to like the CLOTHES - sorry honey - picked for him and um…I am taking back that horrible half pleather, half knit perforated peplum princess by Vera Wang disaster that I was clearly stoned when I put it in the buggy….yes. Love me some Kohl’s!)

You know what is even better than the small fortune I saved at Kohl’s?? Jessah & Erin’s Ornament Swap! Today is the day!!! I’ve been waiting for this day ever since my gift arrived from sweet Jessah last week….what a lover this girl is, first of all! This swap was such a joy to be a part of….

I signed up right away when I saw the swap on Erin’s blog and I was so excited to participate. As my weird luck would have it though, something got a little messed up and somehow poor little me got kicked to the curb. For a minute I was very “nobody likes me, everybody hates me, I guess I’ll go eat worms” over the whole thing, but then I dug my Big Girl Panties out and emailed Jessah and what happened next was nothing short of Serendipity. She apologized for the oversight and offered to take me on as an extra swap partner….I started reading more of her blog, wanting to get to know her and every post pulled me in more and more until I was immersed in her journey and the joy that are her blessings in life and her pain and the struggles that are her cross to bear….we had so much in common that reading her story and thinking about her now gives me the chills. It was no accident that I got missed in the swap….Jessah and I were meant to know each other…

Last week, I raced home to find a box from her waiting at my door….inside, I found THE most gorgeous, sparkly pink, lacey ornament that I’ve probably ever seen. First of all, how did she know I was obsessed with pink? And glitter?? Because she’s just that good, folks…..but she didn’t stop there! She also sent me a jar of fragrance beads that actually SMELL pink if you can imagine that and the most fun, festive and precious shade of pink polish….did I score or did I score?? Seriously, I love everything she sent…she went above and beyond because that is just her way. I am so thankful we wound up together…and I am wishing with all my heart for the best Christmas Miracle of all, for her, because hse deserves it and she is going to make an incredible momma. Go visit her blog and see what I chose for her and send her some love. She will touch your heart just like she touched mine.

the requisite thankful post...

All of the “I’m Thankful for…” dedications out here on the interwebz today are making me a little weepy. I feel like sort of a turd for not jumping on the bandwagon till now, when I am obviously writing out of peer pressure and a sense of obligation. It’s not that I’m NOT thankful….I actually believe it is quite the contrary….rather that I am so overwhelmed by all the things for which I am thankful that I’ve been rendered wordless….especially this year, now that the post partum fog has cleared enough for me to see this little life I’ve made. This life that is rarely perfect, but is uniquely mine….

Sometimes I feel like making the requisite ‘Thankful’ list on thanksgiving is a bit like it must be to have to give an Oscar speech…and try to thank everyone who helped you become a super huge mega star….in under 60 seconds. I have enough of an anxiety problem as it is….

So, that said, I am going to try and keep it simple. In fact, never one to shirk at an opportunity to make a list, I’ve already started my 2013 resolutions and Trying to Keep Things Simple is on there…..along with drinking less wine, saying fewer bad words and actually going to the gym. We’ll see how that all works out…one thing at a time….for now, it’s Thanksgiving Eve and today, my heart is full.

I am thankful for…..

My baby. They all told me it would only get better and better every day and they were right. Each morning I love him infinitely more than I did when we fell asleep the night before, snuggled & spooning. His impossibly soft, butter blond hair that I rub my nose in at every opportunity, his sweet blue eyes and his independent spirit. Because he calls me “momma”, I am the luckiest person in the entire world, forever.

My husband. Because he gets me, most of the time. And he forgives me when I am insane, which is, again, most of the time. Because he makes me laugh and he loves me. I know he loves me. That’s pretty incredible all by itself when you think about it. He’s my lobster.

Oooh…speaking of lobster…I’m definitely thankful for lobster….

For my daddy, who was the first man to love me and who showed me how BIG and consuming and wonderful love should be so that I never settled for less than that.

For my mom. Forever. The strongest, smartest, silliest, most loving, amazing person I have ever known. I would give up everything just to have one more day with her, but for the days I did have and for the blessing of having her as my soul mate, I am eternally thankful…

For my best friend Laurie, because she is my partner in crime. The other half of my heart. It’s just that simple. Forever and ever.

For Noreen, because I don’t like very many people, and I got lucky enough to live here and find you again, whom I adore, who never judges the stupid shit I do, who loves me no matter what and who I am honored to be there for, as an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on and a hand to hold. Always.

For wine, because obviously.

For xanax, when I’m not in the mood for wine….or sometimes, if I’ve had a really challenging day, when I’m in the mood for both. Don’t judge me.

For my Vegas girls, my sisters, my little sorority of strong, beautiful women that I would throw myself in front of a train for any day of the week. These girls are my therapy. We have seen each other through ups and downs, tell each other everything, we cry together, we laugh together and we spend the better part of every day sharing our lives across the miles. I do not know where I would be without them and I never want to find out.

For my love of food. I’m a little bit fat because of it, and I’m definitely not thankful for that, but I wouldn’t trade it to be one of those people who don’t find joy in everything that is food….the comfort, the memories, the pleasure.

For David Cook, because I still love him and I think I always will.

For California or Florida, because I know they will always be there waiting for me. I’m coming, I promise.

For Twitter, cuz it entertains the hell out of me on the daily….ohhhh twitter.

For Kiki La’Rue, not leastly because of my love Becka. You’ll be thankful for her too once you go get your shop on!! Do yourself a favor and grab a few Lenore Scarves….one for you, a few for gifts….and get 15% off while you’re at it. You’re welcome.

Now, go stuff your face, you little turkeys….I’ll see you on the flip side. I want read all about how you at and ate and ate till you almost puked and then ran out to narrowly avoid getting trampled by some beast at Walmart at 3 in the morning….it’s the American way. Make me proud.

Love & kisses!

Alka seltzer & regret (a Weight Watchers Update)

Go big or go home? I went big all right….balls to the wall, and not in a good way.

Here’s how the story went down….Weight Watchers was closed yesterday, which is the day I usually go for my weigh in and weekly meeting, so I had to weigh in on Saturday instead (here’s where the blaming starts)…of course, I couldn’t get my act together on Saturday morning and didn’t get out of the house until almost noon, so of course I had already had a gallon of coffee and some breakfast…so a day early and after a full breakfast, the receptionist chirpily informed me that I had gained two tenths of a pound.

I always knew this day would come eventually, and I fully expected it would make me want to drink bleach, but I was suprisingly ok with it...the little voice inside my head was already rattling off excuses…

Source: google.com via Rachel on Pinterest

Between my weigh in and the time we left for Passover dinner at Uncle Petey’s in Queens, something snapped and I was all f@#% THIS dumb program! I’ll show YOU two tenths of a pound! And um…..well, that’s where the downward spiral began….

Between Saturday afternoon and Sunday night, I managed to consume approximately ALL of the wine in Queens and Suffolk county (this is not a joke.) as well as an embarrassing amount of brisket, too many matzoh balls to count, chocolate drenched matzoh bark, at least 26 Reese’s miniature peanut butter cups, a ramekin of broken up, stale tortilla chips drenched in melted cheese and Frank’s Red Hot (my weakness. I never claimed to be classy), a sheet of matzoh covered in butter, a whole basket of chips with salsa and ranch (which they serve you in a soup cup, by the way) from chili’s and a grilled chicken sandwich with cheese, bacon and THREE (yes, three.) sides of honey mustard. Oh, and fries. A lot of fries.

Sometimes you have to go back and do the things you used to do to remind yourself why you stopped doing them in the first place.

I woke up this morning feeling like I got hit by an 18 wheeler. I threw down a cup of alka seltzer before I left the house and scratched and clawed my way back up the side of the wagon….the wagon that for the past few days got so far away from me, I almost couldn’t see it, but I tracked it down…..and I climbed back on and I’m here to say that the next time I try and fall off said wagon, cuz there will most certainly be a next time, I promise at least to hold on to the back bumper with one hand.

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Passover & Easter were both delightful, despite the gluttony and sloth that seemed to be my M.O….Ben had an awesome time hanging out with his cousins, the food was delicious (obviously) and the laughs were plentiful.

The Easter basket was a complete surprise and the look on Ben’s face when I walked in the room with it yesterday morning was absolutely priceless….He dug right in, went straight for the good stuff and was covered in a peanut butter & chocolate Reeseter Bunny in no time at all….yes, before breakfast. Sometimes, in the name of fun and celebration, you have to make questionable parenting decisions. That's where the good memories are made....

Hope your holidays were all happy and healthy!!!

dear santa....

i figure everybody loves a good gift guide....and while i have been stalking all of these things on the internet, adding them to shopping carts to and fro and then closing my browser superfast so as not to accidentally get out my credit card and buy them (like i did with the urban decay naked 2 palatte earlier this week...ooops.), i really do think these picks of mine would be great for anyone...your mom, your secret santa, your best girlfriend, your wife (ahem!)....and besides, i just really wanted to have them all in one place so i didn't have to keep cyber-stalking like a creep.

P.s. I just realized I screwed up my numbers. Seriously, how hard is it to number things? I'm hopeless...lol

1.Erin Condren Planner

2.infinity scarf

3. dabnee lee case for iphone4

4. clarisonic mia

5. tom's, size 10

it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!!!

ho! ho! ho!!!

sorry...i couldn't help myself! i've just been feeling so darned FESTIVE since friday!!! why friday, you ask?? well, a couple of weeks ago, i wrote about this crazy fun blog swap i was participating in called How The Glitz Stole Christmas hosted by gorgeous Raven and her equally as purty and glam BFF . i told you all about how lucky i was that i managed to score the super sweet, very adorable and totally fubulous dana as my gift swapper but what i didn't know then was that i was even luckier than i thought!!!

Dana's gift for me arrived on friday and i raced home from work because i had a feeling it would be waiting there for me...lemme tell you something ladies….THIS GIRL CAN SHOP!! i absolutely adored my glitzy prezzies! i keep trying to decide which is my favorite…i mean, i am obsessed with personalized stationery (how did she know??), and those cocktail napkins?? seriously? to die for! and that precious, perfect ornament? nothing could possibly be cuter! so thoughtful and creative! i love it all!

that was seriously SO much fun and i hope i have the opportunity to participate in something like this again….i just loved all of my little goodies from Dana, but even more than the presents, i am thankful to have a new friend…i honestly can’t think of a better gift than that!

thank you, Dana!!! it was a total blast being your glitz and glam partner! i am wishing you happy, healthy holidays filled with love and snuggles and sweet puppy kisses from your precious Frankie and hoping Santa brings you everything you ask him for!

wordless wednesday....thanksgiving 2011

good times were had by all on benny's first thanksgiving. he enjoyed goldfish crackers, turkey, stuffing and even some brussells sprouts and we enjoyed wine, laughter and each other's company. who could ask for anything more??

the one thanksgiving tradition we hold above all else (besides the turkey, obviously) is churning. we take our churning very seriously and the hands that have held tight to that handle and churned their little hearts out over the years are the hands we hold the closest in our hearts. it was ben's first year to churn and he was a rockstar. and if you've never tasted freshly churned butter? boy are you missing out!

beautiful monica and her beautiful daughter.

have i ever told you how much i love my sister in law?