we've touched on it a number of times in the last 6 weeks or so.
i have been trying my hardest to avoid it and when it innevitably struck me anyway despite my valliant efforts and distractionary techniques (including straight up denial), i chose instead to try and CURE it by making list after list and post after post of glittery, gorgeous, delicious wonderful things that people could get for me...me! the birthday princess with the little black rain cloud following me around that maybe nobody would notice because my nails were so sparkly in the katy perry teenage dream nail polish that i had to have...
and i am humbled, because what i learned with that little exercise is that i have some really, really amazing people in my life who actually listen to me and who want to make me as happy as i can be and (i'm sitting here crying) i don't use this term often, but it really is so justified, i am SO blessed to be as loved as i am by these people whom i love right back more than any words could ever really explain. i really don't feel like i deserve it, but they just keep right on loving me. and i'm not saying this just because i've gotten most of the things on my 40 days of birthday ideas list which blows my mind anyway, but i'm saying it because there i was, listing all this material stuff that i wanted and these people who love me ran right out and got it for me hoping it would make me happy and it did on some level. i mean, it does. i am so happy about it and excited for it all but....i still felt like something wasn't right. how could i have all of the things i asked for and still have IBD? having my birthday wishes granted was supposed to be the cure dammitalltohell!!!!!
so i moped. and i claimed my very own rogue black raincloud. and i drank a lot of wine. and i'm going to continue to mope and drink wine and hide under my cloud from time to time but i have good news. really good news, in fact. i cured my IBD. do you want to know how i did it?
i signed ben and i up for a play & learn class at gymboree on saturday morning.
and just ike that, , i was happy. and i knew that i had planned the EXACTLY PERFECT way that i wanted to spend my birthday. after all, no gift i have ever gotten or will ever get for the rest of forever could compare to the gift i got on HIS birthday last december and really? i can't think of anywhere i would rather be. i am honestly SO excited for us to play and learn together!
would you look at this precious little face?!???